Judgement Jokes

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Individuals who constantly boast about themselves to be presented with Daenerys Targaryen Award of excellence.

Students attending MUNs and pretending to be intellectual will be banned from uploading candid debate pictures on Facebook.

Judging people for the number of times they have tea during the day is punishable under Chai Shaming Act.

Individuals who keep commenting on your old facebook pictures will be punished for intentional insult and provocation.

While playing musical chairs, individuals found walking slowly and expectantly by the chairs so that others' chances of winning are reduced will be given musical gaalis.

Incessantly asking for mobile hotspots will be considered a serial act of harassment.

People who keep their WiFi open shall be honoured with Nobel Peace Prize for their immense help to all the seeders and leechers around the world.

Professors at Harvard University are instructed to use Indian case-study of emptying the toothpaste tube with a "belan" so as to teach the concept of optimum utilization of resources to students.

People who have never played Pen Fight in their lives are advised to go back to school and relive their childhood.

People found using dog filter on Snapchat will be made to eat Pedigree for the rest of their lives.

Citizens are advised to not call themselves as "dreamers" if they never dreamt of owning Sanju's Magic Pencil.

Individuals who do not write CA, Dr or Er as a prefix in their name on Facebook shall be stripped off their respective degrees.

Individuals who pronounce meme as "maymay" shall be made to perform their walk of atonement.

Girls who extensively bargain while shopping will be declared Below Poverty Line.

Mental harassment case shall be filed against individuals uploading Boomerang videos on Instagram.

Saying NO to Rajma Chawal, Non-Veg, Pani Puri is a non-bailable offence.

People who untag themselves from Family pictures on facebook will not be eligible to claim any share in the will.

Individuals found stealing Saunf in restaurants by wrapping them in tissue papers will be given a title of Chindhi Chor.

Individuals who keep confusing unlock pattern on their phones will be hired by NASA to decrypt  complex alien signals.

Students who managed to predict the paragraph they'll have to read out in class by counting the number of students before them shall teach Critical Crisis Thinking at MIT.

Individuals who buy popcorn in movie theatres will be included in Forbes List of Richest Indians Alive.

The sole indicator of you being rich or poor as a kid was determined by whether you played cricket with Hard Tennis or Pepsi Rubber Ball.

Students eating snacks during lectures without getting caught are the real bravehearts our nation needs.

The term INTERN to be renamed as Berozgaar Mazdooor, effective from midnight.

Anyone found uploading fake candids can be booked for conspiracy against innocent citizens.

People who claim to be football fans and don't even know what offside rule is will be punished under The Wannabe Act, 2002.

People using tall friends as selfie sticks will be charged with misappropriation of assets.

People who do not eat Hide & Seek by biting one line at a time will be booked for blasphemy.

People calling others as "Bade Log" will be made The Lilliputians in Gulliver's Travels.

People who reply with "Akele, Akele?" everytime you tell them you are having something to eat will be starved to death.

The ones who claim to be busy and forget texting you back will be punished for making a fool out of an innocent citizen.

Commenting again on your DP so that it shows up on newsfeed and gets you additional likes is a fraudulent activity.

Facebook has been instructed to remove users who Work at Student.

People using "Aur batao" more than once in a conversation shall be made to listen the speeches of Modi and Kejriwal in one go.

People not posting review after watching a movie shall be thrown out of the theatre immedietly after national anthem on their next turn.

:: Bombay High Court

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