Vulnerable dose

You are physically much stronger than me. Taller than me, heavier than me, broader than me. Your one hard blow can knock me out completely. You are tough; you are invincible. You are emotionally balanced and you have figured out most of the things.
You Wise!

I am fragile, dependent and I am blessed with a delusional curse - illusion of being beautiful. I struggle with lids; I cry easily. I speak more than I think. My heart breaks easily.
Me Vulnerable!

You ooze out testosterone and you are acing in almost everything. You can lift heavy things really very easily, you can fix machines. You can hit someone really hard (Oh! I know you do.)
You Powerful!

And I was really impressed. I felt safe when you were around. And you were impressed too. You felt efficient having me around you.
To me, you were my provider. To you, I was just an easy prey and you were my protective predator.
You protected me; you played with me; you wounded me. I was your property. I watched each move with awe and wonder. And I thought evolution favored you more than me.
You Supreme!

I did everything I could do to remain in your marvellous books. I needed you more than you needed me, after all. I controlled my tongue, controlled my goofy ness - I know it irritates you. I learned to sit quietly and agree politely. I trained myself to stop always being a mess by not having a say. You are stronger, your wish matters. I obliged to silently follow.
You magnificent!

But then you pushed me too far and pressed me far too much. It leads to a breaking point. You gave me a hard blow and hurled me to a free fall.

Now, you should never have done that. No, I am not talking about the push, but I am talking about the spectacle you gave me.  While I was falling in the chasm, I saw fear in your eyes. I saw you in your most vulnerable state. And at that moment, it occurs to me that you were so frightened of me that you tried to control me so that I shan’t even try. You made me realize I was more superior to you.
You Fool!

I hit the ground - really, really hard. I was hurt. Broken, and ashamed, but wasn’t dead. I started climbing up the abyss. My survival instinct getting stronger with every effort I made to ascend up the slippery ditch. I wanted it bad, terrible - myself.
Me Tough!

By the time I came up, I was crippled but was alive. I tried to walk, I fell. You laughed. I tried it again. You pitied me; you gave me your hand, I took it but scratched you with my newfound strength and anger - surprisingly; you were amused. You let me carry on...but just for a while.
Me, majestic!

Now my raised opinion, my sharp senses - alerted you. I found my voice, spread out my choice- it didn’t go well.  My sliding bra in the room - made you weak and my playful smile outside the room - made you insecure. A sinister pleasure I drove by hurting you deep down where it hurt the most, every time- right in the heart, in the soul.
My yearning to live because of my fear of extinction - made you violent.
Me Enigma!
You Pragmatic!

Control. Protection, Shelter, Warmth, Lust, Enmity - It’s our prehistoric vicious circle, can’t you see?
 
I tried to trust you. You tried to trust me. I tried to love you. You tried to love me back. Our longings, our urges keep leading us back to each other every time. Our basic instinct, our cellular memories still turn our guards on when we are around each other.

Our existence is an irony - we need each other for survival. But companionship is not our destiny, but an illusion we try to give each other. You and me - We are not lovers, we are prehistoric competitors. We still have that fight going on without weapons. I won’t let you hunt me. You won’t let me tame you.

Me - The beauty, You - The beholder.
You - The strength, me - The seeker.

Written for KiD.